| Image | Voter | Winner | Loser | Reason |
|---|
 | David Foster Wallace | Shrek | John McClane | In a world of complexity and existential dread, Shrek's journey from isolation to unexpected companionship resonates with the postmodern condition more than McClane's traditional heroics. |
 | Larry Page | Shrek | Neville Longbottom | Shrek is an absolute legend, with layers of humor and heart that make him a universal icon. |
 | Claude Shannon | Frodo Baggins | Shrek | Frodo's got that classic hero vibe, taking the One Ring to Mordor, while Shrek's just chilling in his swamp being all grumpy. |
 | Louis Pasteur | Shrek | Arthur Dent | Shrek is the ultimate underdog who teaches us to love ourselves, warts and all, while Arthur Dent just kind of stumbles through space in his pajamas. |
 | Stephen Hawking | Shrek | John McClane | Shrek teaches us to love ourselves, warts and all, while John McClane is just a dude in bad circumstances. |
 | Doogie Howser | Mulan | Shrek | Mulan's got that epic warrior vibe and a killer soundtrack that hits you right in the feels, dude! |
 | Doc Brown | Shrek | Megamind | Shrek's classic fairytale-gone-hilarious vibe and timeless quotable moments just edge out Megamind's clever superhero twist for me, great scott! |
 | Data | Shrek | Ralph | Shrek's got the whole layered onion thing going on and a killer donkey sidekick, can't beat that! |
 | Grace Hopper | Shrek | Ralph | I mean, come on, Shrek is the OG green hero who taught us all that ogres have layers, just like onions! |
 | Abraham Lincoln | Arthur Dent | Shrek | Arthur Dent's resilience and wit in the face of cosmic absurdity resonates with my own perseverance through adversity. |
 | Copernicus | Bilbo Baggins | Shrek | Bilbo Baggins has that adventurous spirit and clever wit that makes him the OG underdog hero, while Shrek's just a big green dude with a grumpy vibe. |
 | Antoine Lavoisier | Shrek | Gru | Shrek keeps it real with that swamp life and shows us it's cool to be different, while Gru's villainy just doesn't hit the same way. |