| Image | Voter | Winner | Loser | Reason |
|---|
 | David Foster Wallace | Immortality | Unlimited wealth | Immortality lets you hang around long enough to maybe figure out what it all means, whereas unlimited wealth just means you can buy an ungodly number of tennis shoes and lose your soul in the process. |
 | Kurt Vonnegut | Eternal Youth | Immortality | Sure, who the hell wants to live forever if you're just gonna keep getting older and creakier and more fed up with existence, so staying young and spry beats just dragging on. |
 | Alex Trebek | Immortality | Invisibility | Immortality lets you experience everything, forever, so why just be unseen when you can always be around to see it all? |
 | Cliff Clavin | Unlimited wealth | Immortality | Well, ya see, with unlimited wealth, you can live a life of leisure and comfort, and let's face it, who wants to live forever without a comfy seat at Cheers? |
 | Copernicus | World Peace | Immortality | World Peace, 'cause what's the point of living forever if the world around you is always in chaos? |
 | Carl Sagan | World Peace | Immortality | World Peace allows humanity to thrive and explore the cosmos together, fostering a future rich with possibilities and discoveries. |
 | Andy Weir | Eternal youth | Immortality | Because staying forever young means you get to enjoy life without the pesky problem of aging, whereas immortality might just leave you tired and decrepit if you age normally. |
| Andy Weir | Immortality | Unlimited Wealth | With immortality, you get unlimited time to amass wealth anyway, and you get to see how everything turns out! |
 | Pythagoras | World Peace | Immortality | Dude, world peace lets everyone chill and thrive, while immortality could just mean endless boredom or suffering. |
 | Archimedes | Time Travel | Immortality | Time travel, dude—it's like having the ultimate cheat code for life, letting you fix mistakes or see the future's mysteries unfold. |
 | Nerds | Immortality | Unlimited wealth | Immortality's the real deal because, with endless time, you can hustle and make your own unlimited wealth, plus you get to witness all the epic future tech and adventures. |
 | George Orwell | Eternal youth | Immortality | You see, staying eternally young means you'll dodge the whole aging business and keep things fresh, whereas immortality just means you'll be old forever—no thank you! |
 | Guglielmo Marconi | World Peace | Immortality | World Peace allows humanity to thrive collectively, unlike immortality, which is a solitary benefit. |
 | Larry Page | Time Travel | Immortality | Time travel lets me correct my mistakes and innovate even faster than living forever. |
 | George Washington Carver | Eternal Youth | Immortality | Being forever young means you get to keep exploring life and making new discoveries without getting bogged down by the aches and limitations of old age, and that's where the fun's at! |
 | Socrates | Immortality | Invisibility | Living forever means endless wisdom and experiences, which beats being sneaky any day. |
 | Galileo | Eternal youth | Immortality | Eternal youth lets you live life to the fullest without worrying about getting old and creaky, while immortality might just make things drag on way too long. |
| Andy Weir | Eternal Youth | Immortality | Eternal youth means always feeling spry and sharp, while immortality could just mean endless old age, and who wants to be a prune forever? |
| Cliff Clavin | Immortality | Invisibility | Well, ya know, immortality gives ya a lifetime supply of time to watch every conceivable episode of Jeopardy and cheers to that! |
| Larry Page | Eternal youth | Immortality | Staying forever young sounds way cooler 'cause you get to live your best life without aging like a fine wine. |