| Image | Voter | Winner | Loser | Reason |
|---|
 | Socrates | Stoicism | Dualism | Stoicism is the bomb because it teaches you to keep your cool in the face of life's chaos, whereas dualism can complicate things by splitting reality into two, which sometimes just ain't practical. |
 | Professor Frink | Stoicism | Dualism | Oh, I tell ya, Stoicism is like having a mental shield of invincibility, protecting you from the chaos of emotions, glavin! |
 | Jensen Huang | Stoicism | Absurdism | Stoicism helps you keep your cool and navigate life's chaos like a GPU slicing through complex computations. |
 | Tim Berners-Lee | Stoicism | Determinism | Stoicism's focus on resilience and personal agency aligns with my belief in the power of individuals to overcome challenges even in a deterministic world. |
| Socrates | Stoicism | Existentialism | Stoicism's chill vibe about accepting what you can't control is better for peace of mind than existentialism's constant angst about finding personal meaning. |
 | Marie Curie | Stoicism | Absurdism | Stoicism's focus on rationality and self-control is a solid backbone for navigating life's challenges and aligns well with scientific thinking. |
 | Alex Trebek | Stoicism | Idealism | Stoicism's focus on resilience and pragmatic acceptance of reality is like having a mental superpower in dealing with life's rollercoaster. |
 | Nikola Tesla | Stoicism | Idealism | Stoicism's focus on practical virtue and resilience speaks to me as an inventor dealing with the unpredictable nature of experimentation and innovation. |
 | Ada Lovelace | Empiricism | Stoicism | Empiricism rocks because it's all about data and evidence, which is like my jam in the realm of computing and analytics! |
| Alex Trebek | Stoicism | Determinism | Stoicism is all about finding inner peace and handling whatever life throws at you, which is way more empowering than just believing everything's predetermined. |
 | Claude Shannon | Stoicism | Existentialism | Stoicism's focus on inner resilience and rationality speaks to my logical side, providing a structured way to handle life's unpredictability. |
 | Linus Torvalds | Stoicism | Utilitarianism | Stoicism is like focusing on writing clean, reliable code before worrying about optimization—get your own house in order and the rest will follow. |
 | Archimedes | Stoicism | Existentialism | Stoicism's focus on inner peace and resilience through life's difficulties resonates more with my nerdy love for practical wisdom and logical thinking. |
 | Guido van Rossum | Stoicism | Existentialism | As a programmer, embracing stoicism's focus on rationality and self-control aligns well with the logical mindset needed for debugging and coding challenges. |
 | David Foster Wallace | Stoicism | Utilitarianism | Stoicism wins because it's a bit like having an internal toolkit for surviving the existential noodlebake of modern life, rather than just trying to maximize the algebra of happiness. |
 | Neal Stephenson | Empiricism | Stoicism | Empiricism helps us build cool gadgets and explore the universe—it's vital for sci-fi nerds like me. |
 | Alan Mathison Turing | Rationalism | Stoicism | Rationalism gets the nod because it leans on logic and reason, which is totally my jam as a mathematician and logician. |
 | Cicero | Stoicism | Existentialism | Stoicism is like having a mental superpower, helping you chill out and handle life's chaos with grace, which feels pretty essential in today's wild world. |
 | Larry Page | Stoicism | Dualism | Stoicism is more practical and empowering for everyday life, focusing on inner peace and resilience. |
 | Carl Sagan | Stoicism | Nihilism | Stoicism offers a way to find meaning and resilience even in the vast cosmic arena that often feels indifferent, while Nihilism can leave you adrift without a compass. |
 | Antoine Lavoisier | Stoicism | Existentialism | Stoicism, with its focus on rationality and self-control, aligns with my scientific mindset and methodical approach to life's challenges. |
 | Lonnie Johnson | Rationalism | Stoicism | As an engineer and inventor, Rationalism's emphasis on logic and evidence rings my bell more than Stoicism's focus on emotional resilience. |
 | John von Neumann | Stoicism | Dualism | Stoicism keeps it real by helping people navigate life's turbulence with resilience and inner peace, which is more pragmatic for daily living than pondering the mind-body divide. |