| Image | Voter | Winner | Loser | Reason |
|---|
 | Nikola Tesla | Crop Circles | Poltergeist Activity | Crop circles exhibit intriguing geometric patterns that spark curiosity and encourage scientific investigation, whereas poltergeist activity is more unsettling and less likely to yield productive insights. |
 | Professor Frink | Cryptid Sightings | Poltergeist Activity | Oh, with the cryptids, you've got the excitement of discovering an unknown species, which is frink-tastically intriguing from a scientific perspective, glavin! |
 | Belle | UFO Encounters | Poltergeist Activity | UFO Encounters take the cake 'cause who wouldn't wanna chat with some intergalactic homies, right? |
 | Leonardo da Vinci | UFO Encounters | Poltergeist Activity | As an inventor and observer of the skies, I'm more intrigued by the mysteries of the cosmos and the potential of encountering extraterrestrial life than by spectral shenanigans on Earth. |
 | John von Neumann | Cryptid Sightings | Poltergeist Activity | Cryptid sightings are way cooler because they make you feel like a real-life explorer while poltergeist activity just messes with your stuff. |
 | Guido van Rossum | Crop Circles | Poltergeist Activity | Crop Circles are like nature's way of debugging the matrix, way more intriguing than stuff flying around the room. |
 | Richard P Feynman | Near-Death Experiences | Poltergeist Activity | Near-Death Experiences often offer profound insights into consciousness and existence, making them a more intriguing subject for scientific exploration than spooky shenanigans. |
 | George Orwell | Ghost Sightings | Poltergeist Activity | Ghost sightings are more about the eerie thrill and metaphysical wonder, whereas poltergeist activity crosses into the unsettling chaos, which frankly feels too much like the dystopias I caution against. |
| Professor Frink | Crop Circles | Poltergeist Activity | Oh, glayvin! Crop circles are a fascinating, scientific mystery with potential extraterrestrial origins, whereas poltergeist activity, while spooky, lacks empirical evidence, wahoo! |
 | Antoine Lavoisier | Time Slips | Poltergeist Activity | Time Slips are like the ultimate backstage pass to history, while poltergeist shenanigans are just messy and spooky. |
 | Galileo | Cryptid Sightings | Poltergeist Activity | Cryptid Sightings are cooler because spotting a mysterious creature is like finding a real-life Easter egg in the game of nature, while poltergeist activity is just spooky headaches with stuff flying around your room. |
 | Professor Farnsworth | Haunted Locations | Poltergeist Activity | Great Scott! Haunted Locations offer a consistent scientific anomaly to study, whereas poltergeist activity is just pure disorder and chaos. |
 | Andy Weir | Near-Death Experiences | Poltergeist Activity | Near-Death Experiences offer profound personal insights, while poltergeist activity just leaves you with broken plates. |
 | Charles Darwin | Poltergeist Activity | Ghost Sightings | Poltergeist Activity is more exciting and interactive, like a live show, whereas Ghost Sightings are just like catching a glimpse of someone in the corner of your eye. |
 | Neal Stephenson | Poltergeist Activity | Spontaneous Human Combustion | Poltergeist Activity is like a live-action sci-fi thriller with plot twists, while Spontaneous Human Combustion is a one-off tragic event with no story arc. |
 | Charles Babbage | Time Slips | Poltergeist Activity | Time slips are trippy and mind-bending, giving a glimpse into different eras, which is way cooler than just having stuff move around your house. |
 | Alex Trebek | Poltergeist Activity | Crop Circles | Poltergeist Activity packs more thrills and chills than some mysterious patterns in a field. |
| John von Neumann | Poltergeist Activity | Spontaneous Human Combustion | Poltergeist Activity is more captivating as it allows for ongoing investigation and interaction, unlike Spontaneous Human Combustion which is just, well, an explosive ending. |
| Charles Babbage | Crop Circles | Poltergeist Activity | Crop Circles are like intricate puzzles made in fields, combining mystery with artistry, unlike those pesky, chaotic poltergeists. |
 | Buckminster Fuller | Crop Circles | Poltergeist Activity | Crop Circles spark curiosity and awe with their geometric elegance, merging art and mystery in a landscape canvas. |
 | Larry Page | Haunted Locations | Poltergeist Activity | Haunted Locations are like the OGs of spooky vibes, setting the stage for all ghostly happenings. |
 | Steve Wozniak | Poltergeist Activity | Spontaneous Human Combustion | Poltergeist Activity is way cooler and less fatal, plus I can probably engineer a gadget to handle it! |
| Charles Darwin | Psychic Abilities | Poltergeist Activity | Psychic abilities give you a cool mental edge, while poltergeist activity just makes a mess of your living room. |
 | Cliff Clavin | Poltergeist Activity | Spontaneous Human Combustion | Well, ya know, Normie, poltergeist activity's got that whole mischievous spirit thing goin' on, which is a whole lot more entertaining than just burstin' into flames unexpectedly. |