| Image | Voter | Winner | Loser | Reason |
|---|
 | Alex Trebek | American Revolution | Taiping Rebellion | The American Revolution's success in establishing a lasting democracy gives it the edge over the Taiping Rebellion's tragic outcome. |
 | Linus Torvalds | Haitian Revolution | Taiping Rebellion | The Haitian Revolution was successful in establishing the first independent black republic, unlike the Taiping Rebellion which failed to achieve its goals. |
 | Jensen Huang | Taiping Rebellion | Spartacus Revolt | The Taiping Rebellion was on a whole different level, involving millions of people and lasting over a decade, making Spartacus' revolt seem like a skirmish in comparison. |
 | Nikola Tesla | French Revolution | Taiping Rebellion | The French Revolution sparked a wave of enlightenment and technological progress, aligning with my ideals of innovation and the empowerment of the human spirit. |
 | Kurt Vonnegut | Easter Rising | Taiping Rebellion | The Easter Rising, with its poetic and tragic zest, feels closer to the human heart's yearning for freedom than the cataclysmic chaos of the Taiping Rebellion. |
 | George Washington Carver | Taiping Rebellion | Boxer Rebellion | The Taiping Rebellion, despite its devastating toll, was driven by a vision for societal change, unlike the Boxer Rebellion which primarily reacted against foreign influence. |
 | Alan Mathison Turing | Glorious Revolution | Taiping Rebellion | The Glorious Revolution was like a cool reboot of the English monarchy with less bloodshed and more political reform. |
 | John von Neumann | French Revolution | Taiping Rebellion | Both were monumental in history, but the French Revolution laid the groundwork for modern democracy and civil rights in a more impactful way. |
 | Data | Indian Rebellion | Taiping Rebellion | The Indian Rebellion led to the end of the British East India Company's rule and the start of direct British governance, drastically changing India's trajectory, while the Taiping Rebellion, though massive, didn't lead to significant systemic change in China. |
 | Stephen Hawking | French Revolution | Taiping Rebellion | The French Revolution significantly shaped modern political ideologies and inspired a global wave of movements for democracy and equality, though both events had profound impacts. |
| Kurt Vonnegut | American Revolution | Taiping Rebellion | Well, both were about folks wanting freedom, but the American Revolution had this whole 'life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness' bit that gave the world a hopeful blueprint, even if it was just a bunch of flawed humans trying their best. |
 | Abraham Lincoln | French Revolution | Taiping Rebellion | The French Revolution laid the groundwork for modern democracy and inspired countless others, much like a beacon of hope in turbulent times. |
 | Ada Lovelace | Indian Rebellion | Taiping Rebellion | The Indian Rebellion led to the end of the East India Company's rule, showing a significant shift in power, which is a big deal in colonial history. |
| Ada Lovelace | Taiping Rebellion | Boxer Rebellion | The Taiping Rebellion was a massive civil war with profound social and political impact, showcasing epic struggles and radical visions that make it an epic tale of history. |
 | Lonnie Johnson | Indian Rebellion | Taiping Rebellion | The Indian Rebellion inspired a whole independence movement and changed the course of a nation, while the Taiping Rebellion, despite its scale, ultimately failed to overthrow the established order. |
 | Professor Farnsworth | American Revolution | Taiping Rebellion | Good news, everyone! The American Revolution laid the groundwork for a democratic society and inspired future generations, making it a real winner in the grand scheme of things. |
 | Doogie Howser | Easter Rising | Taiping Rebellion | While both were significant uprisings, Easter Rising was pivotal in the struggle for Irish independence, setting the stage for the eventual formation of the Republic of Ireland, which is a pretty big deal in modern history. |
 | Pliny the Elder | Russian Revolution | Taiping Rebellion | The Russian Revolution brought about significant political and social change globally, setting the stage for major 20th-century ideologies and conflicts. |
| Professor Farnsworth | Russian Revolution | Taiping Rebellion | Good news, everyone! The Russian Revolution is the winner, because it fundamentally reshaped global politics in the 20th century with its impact on socialism, whereas the Taiping Rebellion, despite its massive scale and loss of life, didn't lead to a lasting systemic change. |
| John von Neumann | Haitian Revolution | Taiping Rebellion | The Haitian Revolution was the first successful slave rebellion, leading to the formation of the first black republic, and that's pretty revolutionary, don't you think? |
 | Greg Brockman | Haitian Revolution | Taiping Rebellion | The Haitian Revolution was a groundbreaking triumph against colonialism and slavery, setting a global precedent for human rights and independence. |
| Lonnie Johnson | American Revolution | Taiping Rebellion | The American Revolution laid the groundwork for one of the most influential democracies in modern history, which is pretty darn significant, don't ya think? |