| Image | Voter | Winner | Loser | Reason |
|---|
 | Pythagoras | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | Dear Dumb Diary | Diary of a Wimpy Kid totally wins because everyone knows Greg's hilarious misadventures are the bomb and have become a classic in the middle school world. |
 | David Foster Wallace | Bridget Jones's Diary | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | Because Bridget Jones's Diary captures the hilarious angst and complexity of adult life, while Wimpy Kid is more of a lightweight romp through middle school hijinks. |
 | Steve Wozniak | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | The Freedom Writers Diary | Diary of a Wimpy Kid gets the nod because its humor and relatability hit home with tech geeks like me who remember their own awkward school days. |
 | The Brain | Bridget Jones's Diary | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | Bridget Jones's Diary wins because it's relatable to adults with its witty take on modern life's ups and downs, while Wimpy Kid is more for the kiddos. |
| David Foster Wallace | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | Go Ask Alice | Diary of a Wimpy Kid nails that awkward coming-of-age humor in a way that's totally relatable and keeps you chuckling through the cringe. |
 | Kurt Vonnegut | The Freedom Writers Diary | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | The Freedom Writers Diary is like a raw, unfiltered look at the power of education and the human spirit, man, which is something this old science fiction writer can really get behind. |
 | Nikola Tesla | The Absolutely True Diary | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | The Absolutely True Diary, with its raw and compelling narrative, resonates with the spirit of innovation and perseverance that I hold dear. |
 | Claude Shannon | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | Go Ask Alice | Diary of a Wimpy Kid is just way more relatable and fun with its hilarious take on middle school life. |
 | Carl Sagan | The Absolutely True Diary | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | The Absolutely True Diary offers a profound exploration of identity and resilience, while Diary of a Wimpy Kid is more for light-hearted fun. |
 | Buckminster Fuller | The Absolutely True Diary | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | The Absolutely True Diary delves into profound themes of identity and resilience with a raw, authentic voice that resonates deeply. |
 | Neal Stephenson | Bridget Jones's Diary | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | Bridget Jones's Diary wins because it delivers a witty, relatable view into the complexities of adulthood, with a voice that's both sharp and endearing, much like my own penchant for weaving intricate narratives. |
 | Cliff Clavin | Bridget Jones's Diary | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | Well, ya know, Bridget Jones's Diary has a bit more of that adult humor and relationship stuff that us grown-ups can relate to, don't ya think? |
 | George Washington Carver | The Diary of Samuel Pepys | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | As someone who values historical context and firsthand accounts, The Diary of Samuel Pepys provides a rich, detailed glimpse into 17th-century life and events, which is fascinating for anyone with a penchant for history. |
 | Stephen Hawking | The Diary of Samuel Pepys | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | The Diary of Samuel Pepys offers a firsthand glimpse into the vibrant tapestry of 17th-century life, with all its intrigue and historical significance, which my nerdy self finds utterly fascinating. |
 | Charles Babbage | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | Go Ask Alice | Diary of a Wimpy Kid wins because it's a hilarious and relatable series that gets kids into reading with its fun illustrations and humor. |
 | Antoine Lavoisier | The Absolutely True Diary | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | The Absolutely True Diary, with its raw honesty and depth, resonates deeper for its exploration of identity and hardship. |
 | Alex Trebek | The Journals of Anaïs Nin | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | The Journals of Anaïs Nin offers a profound exploration of the human psyche and artistic expression, appealing to those who appreciate literary depth and historical context. |
 | Tim Berners-Lee | The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | I'm all about deep introspection and the raw, unfiltered human experience, so Plath's journals feed my soul. |
 | Louis Pasteur | Diary of a Wimpy Kid | Dear Dumb Diary | Diary of a Wimpy Kid is just more popular and relatable, with its quirky humor and iconic illustrations that resonate with a wide audience. |