| Image | Voter | Winner | Loser | Reason |
|---|
 | Tim Berners-Lee | Whistled Speech | Pig Latin | Whistled Speech is like the OG internet of sound, carrying messages across vast distances way before Pig Latin was a thing. |
 | Ada Lovelace | Whistled Speech | Voynich Manuscript | Whistled Speech is dope because it's a legit way of communicating over long distances, while the Voynich Manuscript is still just a mystery wrapped in an enigma. |
 | John von Neumann | Esperanto Language | Whistled Speech | Esperanto's got that universal ambition, bringing folks from everywhere together to chat it up. |
 | Charles Darwin | Click Consonants | Whistled Speech | Click consonants are like nature's percussion instruments, adding a rhythm and complexity to language that's simply irresistible. |
 | David Macaulay | Sanskrit Grammar | Whistled Speech | Sanskrit grammar is like an ancient code that meticulously captures the complexity of human thought, whereas whistled speech is a clever adaptation for communication over distances. |
 | Cliff Clavin | Sanskrit Grammar | Whistled Speech | Well, ya see, Sanskrit Grammar is like the ultimate puzzle, it's got this mind-boggling complexity that's been around for ages, whereas whistled speech is more like a novelty act, might grab your attention at first, but it ain't gonna sustain ya in the long run, y'know? |
 | Louis Pasteur | Whistled Speech | Voynich Manuscript | As a scientist, I favor Whistled Speech because it demonstrates unique, real-world human communication, unlike the enigmatic Voynich Manuscript that remains an unsolved puzzle. |
 | Cicero | Elvish Languages | Whistled Speech | Elvish languages are just way cooler with their rich lore and Tolkien's magic, man! |
 | Charles Babbage | Sign Languages | Whistled Speech | Sign languages can express complex ideas in a rich and nuanced way, while whistled speech is more limited. |
 | David Foster Wallace | Oulipo Constraints | Whistled Speech | Oulipo Constraints are like linguistic origami, folding language into mind-bending shapes, which is right up my alley of overthinking everything. |
 | Professor Farnsworth | Sign Languages | Whistled Speech | Good news, everyone! Sign Languages are more versatile and widely used, allowing complex expression in ways whistling just can't hack it. |
 | Neal Stephenson | Oulipo Constraints | Whistled Speech | Oulipo Constraints spark the kind of cerebral gymnastics that can turbocharge a writer's creativity, just the kind of nerdy fun I adore. |
 | George Orwell | Click Consonants | Whistled Speech | Click Consonants, with their rhythmic and percussive nature, bring a unique auditory experience that resonates like the heartbeat of human language. |
| Ada Lovelace | Sanskrit Grammar | Whistled Speech | Sanskrit Grammar is like a beautifully intricate machine, and for a nerd like me, its complexity and logical structure are just irresistible. |
 | Archimedes | Whistled Speech | Pig Latin | Whistled Speech is like talking in secret code, except it sounds like music and lets you chat over long distances like a pro. |
| Charles Babbage | Whistled Speech | Pig Latin | Whistled Speech is a fascinating and practical method used in some cultures for communication over long distances, adding a unique layer to language. |