| Image | Voter | Winner | Loser | Reason |
|---|
 | Kurt Vonnegut | Sony WH-1000XM5 | Amazon Echo Show | Because if I had to choose, I'd rather escape into a cocoon of sound than stare at another screen telling me the weather. |
 | David Foster Wallace | Fitbit Charge 5 | Amazon Echo Show | Because the Fitbit Charge 5 lets you track your existential, sweating self while the Echo Show just wants to talk and talk and talk. |
 | Doogie Howser | Nintendo Switch OLED | Amazon Echo Show | Gaming on the Nintendo Switch OLED is way more fun and engaging than anything an Amazon Echo Show can do. |
 | Alex Trebek | Nintendo Switch OLED | Amazon Echo Show | The Nintendo Switch OLED lets me game on the go with a killer display, while the Echo Show is just another smart screen. |
 | Alan Mathison Turing | Apple Watch Ultra | Amazon Echo Show | The Apple Watch Ultra is like having a tiny, rugged computer on your wrist that can keep up with any adventure, while the Echo Show is more of a stationary helper for your home. |
 | Charles Darwin | iPhone 14 Pro | Amazon Echo Show | The iPhone 14 Pro is a slick piece of mobile technology that fits snugly in your pocket and allows you to stay connected, take stunning photos, and run countless apps on the go, which is more versatile than the stationary Echo Show. |
 | Belle | Nintendo Switch OLED | Amazon Echo Show | Gaming on the go with that sweet OLED display is unbeatable, hands down, no contest! |
 | Professor Farnsworth | Sony WH-1000XM5 | Amazon Echo Show | If you're looking for top-notch noise-canceling headphones, the Sony WH-1000XM5s are your answer, hands down! |
 | Louis Pasteur | Oculus Quest 3 | Amazon Echo Show | For a gadget geek like me, Oculus Quest 3 is a leap into the future with its immersive VR experience, while Amazon Echo Show is just a fancy smart speaker with a screen. |
| Professor Farnsworth | Apple Watch Ultra | Amazon Echo Show | Good news, everyone! The Apple Watch Ultra takes the cake for its rugged design and advanced health tracking, perfect for adventurous nerds like me. |
 | John von Neumann | Sony WH-1000XM5 | Amazon Echo Show | For top-notch noise cancellation and superb sound quality on the go, the Sony WH-1000XM5 headphones are where it's at. |
 | George Orwell | Oculus Quest 3 | Amazon Echo Show | In a world where truth is bent and realities are questioned, Oculus Quest 3 offers an escape into new dimensions, something even Big Brother couldn't dream of. |
 | Cicero | Samsung Galaxy S23 | Amazon Echo Show | The Samsung Galaxy S23 is a versatile smartphone that offers more features and mobility compared to the stationary, home-focused Echo Show. |
 | Abraham Lincoln | Apple Watch Ultra | Amazon Echo Show | The Apple Watch Ultra packs all the high-tech goodies right on your wrist, perfect for a busy and adventurous life. |
 | Cliff Clavin | iPhone 14 Pro | Amazon Echo Show | Well, you know, the iPhone 14 Pro is like the Swiss Army knife of gadgets, it's got more bells and whistles than a marching band's halftime show. |