| Image | Voter | Winner | Loser | Reason |
|---|
 | Charles Darwin | Bamboo Toothbrush | Recycled Paper Towels | Bamboo toothbrushes are rad because they cut down on plastic waste and keep those pearly whites clean, unlike paper towels that just wipe up spills. |
 | Doogie Howser | Reusable Water Bottle | Recycled Paper Towels | Reusable water bottles are like an eco-friendly sidekick, saving the planet one sip at a time, while recycled paper towels are just trying to clean up the mess. |
 | Klaus Teuber | Reusable Water Bottle | Recycled Paper Towels | Choosing a reusable water bottle is like picking a knight in Catan—it's a long-term win for the planet and keeps you hydrated for countless adventures! |
 | Copernicus | Biodegradable Cutlery | Recycled Paper Towels | Biodegradable cutlery is like a shortcut to a guilt-free, zero-waste lifestyle, man, while recycled paper towels still come with a side of tree-chopping guilt. |
 | Professor Frink | Recycled Paper Towels | Compostable Trash Bags | Oh, hey-hey, recycled paper towels are like, you know, better 'cause they help save trees and reduce waste, glavin! |
 | Nerds | Biodegradable Cutlery | Recycled Paper Towels | Biodegradable cutlery is the eco-friendly hero at your picnic, breaking down naturally while recycled paper towels still need to be tossed out. |
 | Guglielmo Marconi | Natural Cleaning Products | Recycled Paper Towels | Natural cleaning products are like the OG green choice because they avoid nasty chemicals going down the drain, keeping it chill with Mother Earth. |
| Guglielmo Marconi | Recycled Paper Towels | Compostable Trash Bags | Recycled Paper Towels are the real MVP because they help save trees and you can use them over and over, whereas compostable bags are mostly a one-and-done deal. |
 | Claude Shannon | Recycled Paper Towels | Compostable Trash Bags | Recycled paper towels got my vote 'cause you can always reuse the paper, but ain't no point in a compostable trash bag if it ain't full of compostable stuff to begin with. |
 | Tim Berners-Lee | Bamboo Toothbrush | Recycled Paper Towels | Because every time you brush, you're giving a little love to the planet by ditching plastic waste, and that's just awesome! |
 | Buckminster Fuller | Eco-Friendly Notebooks | Recycled Paper Towels | Eco-Friendly Notebooks embody the essence of sustainable innovation by encouraging thoughtful consumption and creative expression, whereas paper towels, although recycled, still perpetuate disposability. |
 | The Brain | Bamboo Toothbrush | Recycled Paper Towels | Bamboo toothbrushes are wicked eco-friendly and help keep plastic outta our oceans, so they totally win this round! |
| Charles Darwin | Biodegradable Cutlery | Recycled Paper Towels | When you think about it, biodegradable cutlery breaks down like nature intended, leaving no trace and no waste, which is a win in my book! |
 | Galileo | Wool Dryer Balls | Recycled Paper Towels | Wool dryer balls are rad because they save energy and soften clothes naturally, making them the eco-friendly MVP in the laundry game. |
 | David Foster Wallace | Recycled Paper Towels | Organic Cotton Tote | The recycled paper towels cut through the existential dread of overconsumption with their practicality, unlike the tote which sometimes just holds more stuff to worry about. |
| Nerds | Organic Cotton Tote | Recycled Paper Towels | Organic cotton totes last longer and save the planet, dude, whereas recycled paper towels still get tossed after one use. |
 | Data | Wool Dryer Balls | Recycled Paper Towels | Wool dryer balls are the bomb because they save money, reduce drying time, and are reusable, unlike those recycled paper towels that you just toss after use. |