| Image | Voter | Winner | Loser | Reason |
|---|
 | Professor Frink | Wife Carrying | Polar Bear Plunge | Oh, with the clavin' and the glayvin', Wife Carrying wins because it's a quirky combination of strength and teamwork, rather than just a cold dip that makes you go brrr! |
 | Charles Darwin | Monkey Buffet | Polar Bear Plunge | Well, I reckon the Monkey Buffet Festival is a wild feast of nature's playful creatures, which is a delightful nod to the wonders of evolution and adaptation. |
 | Carl Sagan | Polar Bear Plunge | Baby Jumping | Life's all about the cosmos and connecting with nature, so a Polar Bear Plunge is a cool way to experience the universe's icy wonders firsthand. |
 | Kurt Vonnegut | Cheese Rolling | Polar Bear Plunge | In a world that often veers towards the absurd, chasing cheese down a hill feels like a Vonnegut novel come to life—an unpredictable embrace of chaos and gravity. |
 | Professor Farnsworth | Cheese Rolling | Polar Bear Plunge | Good news, everyone! Cheese Rolling combines the thrill of chasing a wheel of cheese down a hill with the chance of breaking a hip, which is a perfect blend of risk and reward! |
| Professor Frink | Cheese Rolling | Polar Bear Plunge | Cheese Rolling is better because, oh my glavin, it's not every day you get to chase a wheel of cheese down a hill while everyone laughs at gravity, hee-yaven! |
 | Claude Shannon | Monkey Buffet | Polar Bear Plunge | Monkey Buffet is the bomb because who doesn't love watching a bunch of monkeys chow down on a crazy fruit feast, right? |
 | Linus Torvalds | Monkey Buffet | Polar Bear Plunge | Because who wouldn't want to see a bunch of monkeys having a feast, it's like nature's version of a party and that's pretty cool in my book. |
 | Klaus Teuber | Polar Bear Plunge | Baby Jumping | The Polar Bear Plunge is a cool and invigorating challenge that brings communities together, just like a good board game! |
 | Guido van Rossum | Polar Bear Plunge | Wife Carrying | Polar Bear Plunge is more my style because it's all about taking the plunge into the cold, which feels like a refreshing challenge, whereas wife carrying sounds like too much hard work and logistics! |
 | Pliny the Elder | Night of Radishes | Polar Bear Plunge | Night of Radishes is a rad showcase of creativity and culture, while Polar Bear Plunge is just freezing your buns off. |
 | The Brain | Tomatina Festival | Polar Bear Plunge | Tomatina Festival is a wild, colorful food fight in the warmth of Spain, trumping the bone-chilling dip of the Polar Bear Plunge! |
 | Nikola Tesla | Night of Radishes | Polar Bear Plunge | As a lover of inventive expressions, the Night of Radishes' creative artistry resonates with my passion for innovation and imagination. |
| Linus Torvalds | Polar Bear Plunge | Baby Jumping | Jumping over babies sounds like a debugging nightmare, but a Polar Bear Plunge is a refreshing challenge that builds character, much like tackling tricky code. |
 | Jensen Huang | Tomatina Festival | Polar Bear Plunge | Tomatina Festival's vibrant chaos and cultural flair beat the icy shock of the Polar Bear Plunge hands down! |
 | Socrates | Cheese Rolling | Polar Bear Plunge | Dude, Cheese Rolling is like the OG extreme sport with giant cheese wheels and epic tumbles down a hill! |
 | Abraham Lincoln | Polar Bear Plunge | Boryeong Mud | As a man who braved the cold fields of battle, the exhilarating chill of the Polar Bear Plunge echoes the daring spirit of fortitude and adventure. |
 | Greg Brockman | Cheese Rolling | Polar Bear Plunge | I mean, who wouldn't love the sheer chaos and joy of chasing a wheel of cheese down a hill? It's just so delightfully absurd and thrilling! |
 | Doogie Howser | Tomatina Festival | Polar Bear Plunge | Tomatina Festival is a wild, colorful blast of fun and let's be real, getting pummeled with tomatoes beats freezing my butt off any day. |