| Image | Voter | Winner | Loser | Reason |
|---|
 | Abraham Lincoln | Blue Laws | Sumptuary Laws | While both sets of laws aim to regulate behavior, Blue Laws align more closely with moral ideals and community values than Sumptuary Laws, which often stifle personal freedoms and expression. |
 | Socrates | Blue Laws | Buggery Act | Blue Laws are the lesser evil as they just shut down Sunday boozing, while the Buggery Act was all about intolerance and persecution. |
 | Galileo | Heretic Act | Blue Laws | Dude, freedom of thought is way cooler than strict Sunday rules. |
 | Data | Blue Laws | Buggery Act | Blue Laws are better 'cause they just make you chill on a Sunday, while the Buggery Act was all about oppressive control over personal freedoms. |
 | Antoine Lavoisier | Blue Laws | Witchcraft Act | As a man of science, I favor Blue Laws for their historical impact on societal behavior over the baseless persecutions of the Witchcraft Act. |
 | Claude Shannon | Blue Laws | Buggery Act | Blue Laws are generally focused on maintaining public order on Sundays and have less to do with personal freedoms than the Buggery Act, which was more about criminalizing private behavior. |
| Galileo | Hue and Cry | Blue Laws | Hue and Cry has that old-school neighborhood watch vibe that just feels more community-driven than Blue Laws. |
 | Cliff Clavin | Blue Laws | Curfew Laws | Well, ya know, Blue Laws are like those little nuggets of historical charm that remind us of simpler times, while curfew laws just make ya feel like you're still livin' under your mom's roof, if ya catch my drift. |
 | Neal Stephenson | Blue Laws | Vagrancy Laws | Blue Laws, quirky though they might be, are like ghost echoes from a time when society was tinkering with its moral compass, while Vagrancy Laws tend to harshly criminalize existence, so I’ll go with the lesser of two quirkies. |
 | David Foster Wallace | Blue Laws | Curfew Laws | Blue Laws might cramp Sunday's style, but Curfew Laws totally crash the party of personal freedom. |
| Galileo | Blue Laws | Sumptuary Laws | Blue Laws keep society chill on Sundays without telling folks what they can or can't wear, so they win this round. |
| Neal Stephenson | Hue and Cry | Blue Laws | In a world where community vigilance and self-organization are key, Hue and Cry trumps the restrictive vibe of Blue Laws. |
 | Professor Farnsworth | Heretic Act | Blue Laws | Good news, everyone! The Heretic Act wins because the exploration of unconventional ideas leads to scientific breakthroughs and progress! |
 | Professor Frink | Blue Laws | Buggery Act | Blue Laws, while restrictive, aim to uphold community standards without persecuting specific groups, unlike the Buggery Act, which was quite draconian and oppressive in its historical context. |
 | Louis Pasteur | Blue Laws | Witchcraft Act | As a man of science, I favor Blue Laws for their societal structure attempts, over the Witchcraft Act's superstition-fueled restrictions. |
 | Albert Einstein | Blue Laws | Sumptuary Statutes | Blue Laws win because they aim to preserve social norms without directly controlling personal extravagance, allowing for a little more individual freedom, which is always a good thing. |
| Professor Frink | Blue Laws | Heretic Act | Oh, with the glavin and the religion, Blue Laws keep Sundays quiet and peaceful, unlike the Heretic Act which, you know, was more about the persecution with the burning and the screaming. |
 | Tim Berners-Lee | Blue Laws | Sumptuary Statutes | Blue Laws at least have some historical basis in community welfare, whereas Sumptuary Statutes sound like they belong in a medieval costume drama. |
 | Richard P Feynman | Blue Laws | Buggery Act | Blue Laws are about regulating commerce, which feels less invasive than legislating personal behavior like the Buggery Act. |
 | The Brain | Blue Laws | Sumptuary Laws | Blue Laws win 'cause they're all about chill Sundays, while Sumptuary Laws were just medieval fashion police. |